Love from my point of view has always been a train wreck. I meet someone, we date, we break up, I’m heartbroken, start all over again. It’s a never ending cycle of suffering and disappointment. Being exposed to the dating world for a little while now I could never understand why a good looking man or woman would cheat on his or her significant other. It was always unfathomable to me the act of cheating on a loved one, it seemed surreal and the pain it brings seems only to get worse and worse after the realization that one has been cheated on. After hearing the news of Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart I felt sick. It was their romance that I looked up to, that thousands of other girls looked up to. It was as if there existed a little world with just women who developed hope in their life, just because of Rob and Kristen. They seemed different, like they could endure anything and everything the world threw at them; and this belief made it possible for every day women to never give up and keep looking for their one true love. Well, unfortunately that world was shattered when KRISTEN, not Rob, cheated on the man of all of our dreams. What is most shocking is that it was not a man who went behind a woman’s back, it was the girl, the girl who we all wanted to be. I never understood how normal people would do this to the ones they love, but famous role models we dream about, I just don’t know anymore.
I want to be mad and angry at Kristen, an individual I have never met, but in a way I feel like I am able to relate to her and Rob in a deeper lever. This whole scandal tells me that no matter who we are, no matter what we look like, how much money we have, we are still vulnerable to the pain and suffering that comes along with loving another person. There is no exclusive club in which one can become a member of and become immune to all the horrible things this nasty world has to offer. There is no secret code a person can attain to avoid getting hurt in relationships. I am an average girl who has gotten her heart broken, but just because a couple I looked up to turned out to be just like every other couple any average person knows, does not mean I am going to lose hope for my love life. AND NEITHER SHOULD YOU. We are all the same, no matter what anyone says. Pretty, skinny, tall, fat, we all have the same feelings and the same aspirations. So, instead of looking at Rob and Kristen in a negative way, we need to see them as a heartbroken couple that will need to work hard if they are ever going to make their relationship work again. Love dies, but it has the supernatural ability to be born over and over and over again.
Till next time,
A boyfriend is supposed to be a companion. A person who willingly and voluntarily wants to share his time with you, right?? I think I am mistaken in this assumption, not based on opinion but empirical evidence. You see it is Thursday night and I am alone. I just finished watching Awkward one of my favorite shows, but here I am, alone. Oh he texted me, “what are you doing?” Oh you know you stupid fuck watching tv with my family instead of you coming over to spend to time with your beautiful girl. I don’t understand the point of being with a guy who does not want to spend time with me. I thought that was the whole point, I want someone to be with me and come over and cuddle. I tried to break up with his ass, but oh no, “baby I don’t want to lose you blah blah blah.” Like shut the fuck up. Sometimes I just want to crack open a guy’s head and see if it is really brains in there or some weird substance still unknown to science. If a guy is your boyfriend he automatically has obligations to do what you want to do or at least have the decency to end the relationship. Grow some balls men, because while you are “hanging with the bros,” we are “texting other bros.”
Pissed as hell
It’s funny how no matter how hard I try to forget you, you always seem to find a way back to my mind. I live day by day, whishing and hoping that your memory will slowly fade away into nothingness, never again to hunt me on those sleepless nights. I hate it that when I’m with someone new, I come so close to making myself believe that I am over you. And then, I see your face, that face that I hate more than anything in this entire miserable world, and I realize that I have no feelings for anyone else but you. It is so hard to hate you and love you and miss you and hate you more all at once. My body needs a break from my emotions. I want to love the person I am with, but your memory makes it hopeless. I am too smart to fool my mind, and too foolish to get over you. I pray to a God I don’t believe in, I wish on stars that are not falling, I touch the guitar your fingers played, and melt away on nothing but a memory. You left me by choice, I wish I could say that your memory lingers by choice, but it does not. If it were up to me, I would make your memory disappear in an instant, if it were up to choice your presence will not make me shudder, I would see you and smile and go on with my day. But every time I see you, I force my body to be strong and act as if I am not affected by the air we currently share, I am strong in your eyes, but the second you don’t see me I am so weak I cannot even breathe. I shake and leave the world for days until I can convince myself, once again, that I am over you. I will never be over you and for that you are the Devil. I will always hate you, but I will always love you more. I am on my knees begging for you to come back; but I am on my knees begging myself to get over you at the same time.
I have been a little down lately and have been searching for the things that make me happy. I was walking down the hallway of my school when I noticed a girl wearing an ugly ass sweater. Then, I thought to myself, wow thank god I don’t have that sweater and it made me feel tres bon. I was looking at things that made others look bad, not only did it give me a confidence boost, it also made me a little bit happier.
So just for you here is a tip:
When you are feeling down look at something that makes someone else look bad, and be happy that you are not that person.
And when you become jolly and happy, look at that poor person and compliment them on something, who knows maybe he or she is also having a downer kind of day… Hence, why else would you wear an ugly sweater.
Till next time