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            I started getting pretty excited on our way to the game, I was intrigued at how Eric would react to a professional lacrosse game.  He wanted to get there early so we could have some dinner; chicken fingers and fries, oh yeah classy and nutritious. It was adorable. I could tell he was pretty pumped about the game, hundreds of people wearing orange and black started passing by us, one more drunk than the other.  We got to our FRON ROW SEATS, and waited for the game to start.  The stadium went completely dark, my heart started beating as he held my hand and we waited for the bag pipe player to reach the stadium from the 200 section. Adrenaline was rushing through every fan as the players started appearing one by one, throwing themselves against the glass, fans kept pounding the glass begging for the players to throw themselves at them. It. Was. Awesome.

            The music was loud and it made you want to get up and dance, security guards were preparing themselves for fights that were already initiating. I was home and Eric was right next to me.  Every time my team would score Eric would get up, hit his fits against the glass, scream, just like he had been a fan for years.  He put his arm around me and kissed me every time he had a chance. He kept whispering in my ear, “You are so beautiful. You’re making every guy jealous right now.” He made me melt and I hated him for it.  When the kiss cam came on he quickly put his arms around me, trying every possible way to get our chance in the spot light.  We did not get it, but I got my kiss.

            After the game I did not want the night to end, we went to Spot Coffee; we sat and talked for hours. He held my hand and watched as I poured that caramel macchiato down my throat; he hated coffee so he was drinking a diet coke.  We talked about everything we could think of, he talked about his family, his farm, his car, his future, he was letting me in nice and deep; I was not use to this kind of stuff.  I remember him looking at an old couple and him saying, “I bet you they have been married for 50 years. I want that. I don’t care if I don’t like my wife after a while, I am never getting a divorce.”  I could not believe what I was hearing, I do not really believe in divorce, but the way he talked just made me want him even more. 

            He told me he wanted to live on a farm away from the city, a comment I was not ready to hear.  I hate technology and my dream is to have my own farm in the middle of nowhere, I do not know if he ever realized how perfect he was for me.  Do men ever realize how perfect they are for us? Do they see how their words affect us in ten million ways? All I know is his words did, the more he talked the more I kept to myself, I was not ready to give him a part of me, I was not ready to let him in. Are we ever really ready to let someone into our lives that has the ability to tear our world apart and cause us  a great deal of suffering?  I do not know this question to this day, I know the pain, not the cause for the pain, or why I let myself go through it.  Eric took me home that night, walked me to the door, and kissed me good-night.  Another perfect date. Another perfect night. Another time.



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